yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
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