ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Randomize
