you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Randomize