he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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