Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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