There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
