Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
