Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
