Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
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