What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Randomize
