"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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