I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
