She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Randomize
