This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
