I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
