So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
