Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
i just had sex bonerless
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Randomize
