yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
