I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
