Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
