im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I am naked and annoyed.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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