Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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