so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I have aggressive nipples.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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