Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
