when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize