Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
