i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Randomize