please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
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