In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize