just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Randomize