the new term for farting is butt boxing.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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