508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
