i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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