I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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