My girlfriend figured out who you are.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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