On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
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