The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
