I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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