I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
