Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
