oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
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