the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize