I will die if light touches me.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize