What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
