So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
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