I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
