Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
