What a fucking waste of an outfit
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
