what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize