The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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